Funny Things Kids Say in Counseling

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I’m sure we can all relate to wanting to burst into laughter while trying to hold it in.

As a school counselor, I get a glimpse into how kids see the world through their eyes. I wanted to take a moment to look at the lighter side of school counseling, and some of the funny things that have been said over the years.

I have to admit, with some of these, you just had to be there.


 

(During an elementary classroom introduction at the beginning of the school year.)

Counselor – “Does anyone know what a school counselor does?”

Student – “They cancel school!”

I thought about this for a moment and where he could have come up with this.

Counselor – “Oh!  You must of heard school canceler,  It’s school counselor!

As the class bursts into laughter, I thought about what it would be like to be a School Canceler…like I go around cancelling school.  “Alright everybody, schools cancelled! Whoo-hoo!”


 

6th grader – “My dad doesn’t work.”

Counselor – “Ah, so your dad’s not working right now.”

The student responds with the most sincerity.

6th grader – “No, my dads a Stay-at-Home Mom.”

Laughing on the inside while moving on.


 

2nd grader – “People don’t really know what I am.”

I noticed he had said this like a wise old man, beyond his years.  Meanwhile, I’m wondering why he didn’t say who I am.  He said what I am.

Counselor –  “Oh, well…what are you?”

Student saying this again slowly, wise beyond his years. 

2nd grader – “I’m just a guy in a blue jacket.”

Laughing on the inside.  I’m not sure if he meant to be that profound in his statement. And yes, he was wearing a blue jacket.  Read more

Counseling, Relationships, & Wellness Throughout the Lifespan

“Sometimes I think we feign surrender in order to avoid the hard stuff that’s really there.” ~ Dr. L. Marinn Pierce

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In this episode of the Mindful Owl podcast, Dr. L. Marinn Pierce and I discuss counseling and relationships between wellness, spirituality, and personal dispositions of practicing professional counselors.

Some topics discussed are:

  • What is Counseling?
  • Integral Breath Therapy (IBT) – Integration Concepts
  • Wellness, Spirituality, and Personal Dispositions of Professional Counselors
  • Counselor Impairment
  • Empathy vs Compassion
  • Client-Centered vs Present-Centered
  • Religion and Spiritualty
  • Yoga, Meditation, and Present Moment Awareness
  • Trauma Bonds and Relationships
  • Disembodiment
  • Bypass

and much more…

Dr. L. Marinn Pierce is an Associate Professor and Program Coordinator of Counselor Education at California State University, Fresno.  She received her B.M. in Music Education from Brenau University, M.S. in Community counseling from the University of North Carolina at Greensboro, Ed.S. in Community Counseling from the University of North Carolina at Greensboro, and Ph.D. in Counselor Education from the University of Tennessee.  Dr. Pierce’s clinical experience includes work with a variety of populations across multiple settings. While her primary area of emphasis is children and youth and their families, she has worked with adolescents in residential treatment, individuals with diverse counseling needs in community outpatient settings, children and adolescents in intensive outpatient and partial-hospitalization, and child and adolescent victims of sexual trauma.  Her research interests include counselor professional identity development, wellness, and the integration of spirituality into the counseling process. – American Counseling Association (ACA)

Hope you enjoy!

Listen on iTunes

You can reach Dr. Pierce @MarinnPierce on Twitter or lpierce@csufresno.edu

Further resources shared by Dr. Pierce:

Twitter

Read more

School Counseling and Dual Relationships Among Staff

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Our Ethical Standards for School Counselors have been updated for 2016, becoming much more specific in certain areas.  One area I’d like to point out is regarding dual relationships and managing boundaries — not just with students, but with school staff.

According to the American School Counseling Association Code of Ethics (2016), school counselors are to avoid dual relationships beyond the professional level with school personnel, parents/guardians and students’ other family members when these relationships might infringe on the integrity of the school counselor/student relationship (A.5.c).

You don’t find ethical tenets like this for teachers and other educators, but for counselors, it is more specific on the importance of keeping our relationships with staff professional.  This can present some challenges as you might have guessed, especially with building positive relationships with staff and feeling connected to the school.  Boundaries have to be continuously monitored as we manage multiple relationships among staff, students, and parents.  I’ve come across some great writing on this titled, Dual Relationships in Counseling by Gerald Corey, EdD, and Barbara Herlihy, PhD, which was written in the early 90’s, and I find it to be very relevant today. Read more

We Need to Look at Ourselves First

“It is not fair to ask of others what you are unwilling to do yourself.”  ~ Eleanor Roosevelt

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I once had a teacher express their frustration to me regarding their 1st-grade student not taking responsibility for himself and his actions.  I responded with, “You know what?  I know a lot of adults who are still struggling with that.”

Hearing expressions such as these are common, as school counselors also provide consultation services for teachers and administrators.  We hear many challenges and frustrations while helping to provide meaningful insight to better understand the children in their classrooms.  Do we want our children to learn how to take responsibility?   Of course.  However, knowing that this is a struggle for everyone can help us be more patient, kind, and understanding with our students.

We as educators have to meet kids where they’re at.  We can’t put expectations on kids that we as adults are not meeting.  We have to model the desired behaviors we want our children and future generations to grow up learning.  We can’t expect anything upon them we ourselves are not doing.

We need to live the values we teach.   Read more

DCT Comprehensive Developmental School Counseling Program

ASCA

Abstract

This literature review establishes a K-8 comprehensive developmental school counseling program.  This program is rooted in the ASCA National Model, emphasizing the Organizational Framework and Accountability Elements from Gysbers and Henderson (2006).  This program is based on the theoretical foundations of Developmental Counseling and Therapy (DCT) (Ivey,Ivey, Myers, Sweeney, 2005). Elementary and middle school students are in a unique developmental period of their lives, requiring specific and planned interventions. Counselors not having a focused developmental framework can potentially cause ethical issues such as “grab-bagging” for theoretical interventions on the spot, calling it eclecticism.  Furthermore, counselors may not have any plan or theoretical intervention at all.  Although many school counselors are aware of the need for more developmental programming, most are unsure of how to put it into practice (Paisley, Peace, 1995).  For these reasons, integrating DCT with the ASCA National Model will fully address both the comprehensive and developmental nature of the K-8 school counseling program.

Keywords: comprehensive, developmental, middle school, counseling program, DCT, ASCA, ethical issues, accountability, organizational, framework, K-8

Read the full literature review here

New Podcast! Mindfulness in Schools

“Were so busy following a script and putting academics in front of kids, that we forget that they’re people–learning truly only happens through relationship.” ~ Shannon Hess

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How can we really make a difference in the world through education?  In this episode, Shannon Hess and I discuss some of the problems in education today, and how implementing mindfulness and teaching empathy can be a solution.

Shannon has a wide breadth and background in education. She is currently an induction coordinator for new teachers, mindfulness educator, and social justice advocate in California.  Shannon has a passion for making a difference in the lives of others through connecting to what we all share in common within our humanity. Shannon advocates for the importance of the relationship and discusses ways on how we can revolutionize education, ultimately changing the world.

Keep an eye out for The Five Ms Project, which focuses on self-care and mental well-being.

Mental Health, Mindset, Mindfulness, Mindsight, Movement

Hope you enjoy!

Listen on iTunes

Resources and links discussed in this episode:

http://www.mindfulschools.org

http://therepresentationproject.org

https://www.spiritrock.org

http://thehawnfoundation.org

http://www.stillquietplace.com

http://www.tarabrach.com

You can reach and connect with Shannon at sh41ster@gmail.com

For more on relationships and breaking the generational cycle as discussed in this episode, check out What Matters Most and Breaking the Vicious Cycle.

Breaking the Vicious Cycle

“The way you help heal the world is you start with your own family.” ~ Mother Theresa

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I’ve worked with families and their children in various settings for over a decade now.  Over the years, I’ve noticed a vicious cycle, functioning like an insurmountable curse that plagues families generation after generation. This cycle usually presents itself as at-risk kids who grow up to have their own kids, who are also at-risk, who then grow up to have their own kids, who are at-risk, ad nauseaum — never having really dealt with the underlying issues that are causing the constant family breakdown.  This cycle has never been so apparent to me until now as a school counselor.

In my profession, I come across many students who struggle academically, personally, and socially. Nine times out of ten, when I meet their parents, I can almost instantaneously see exactly what’s going on.  I often see kids dealing with adult problems — problems that aren’t their kid’s responsibility to begin with. These kids begin to fall through the cracks all too often, while their parents are struggling with their own problems; especially with divorce. Read more